yay!

im here finally! yay! it totally sucks being away all week.. and when friday comes along the day just draaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaags by. i brought my boxes.. but Mr. Hubby said to leave them in the car for Miss Fran and i to deal with later.. i was thinking about where we were gonna put all of it on the way here.. and i had no idea lol. good thing there's only clothes and things i use every day left to bring. im so excited to be here all the time.. and not just a couple of days on the weekend.
how awesome is being missed? ive told some of my regular customers at work about my new job and my move and they all say congratulations and that they are gonna miss me :D it makes me feel good. i love being missed. when Miss Fran or Mr hubby tell me during the week that they miss me.. i love it. now they're gonna be like "how can we miss you if you wont GO AWAY!" lol they dont know what they are getting into.. but i dont either, so we're even i guess. lol.
Miss Fran really wants to find some lifestyle friends, and get involved in a munch or something.. there isnt much around here, but i want to also, i have been to munches and lifestyle clubs and i loved all the experiances. so i hope we find something, there is a lot to learn from other people.

thankful thursdays

im thankful that:

1. jurassic park was on tv last night

2. i got a butt plug hehe

3. Miss Fran got screw the roses give me the thorns

4. Shes going to let me read it to Her so we can discuss it togeather

5. 4th of july is comming up and im so excited.. i think fireworks are romantic, and ive never gotten to spend that holiday with a boyfriend/girlfriend Master/Mistress, i am really looking foward to it

6. packing is mostly done

7. my lillies are so tall and huge! and so pretty, and smell good

8. my parents and brother wern't hurt in the earthquake in california

9. tomorrow is friday and i get to go to Miss Fran and Mr. Hubbys tomorrow

10. i have gotten a lot of peace and quiet while my parents and brother are on vacation

11. fish crakers are tasty

12. ratatollie is comming out soon.. disneys first cooking movie! yay!

13. transformers is commin out and we are gonna go see it

14. we watched the first 2 die hard movies this past weekend, im excited to see live long and die hard

15. im half done! lol. im doing 30 thankful's today because i did a regular post the past 2 thursdays

16. i watched stomp the yard and it was super good

17. im moving in! a week from tomorrow! i just feel like bouncing up and down and clapping my hands

18. packing makes me see that i have a lot of stuff to sell and make money!

19. i found a ton of clothes that i didnt realise that i had

20. my relationship with my parents is getting better

21. Miss Fran has a town house for us to look at on sunday

22. im getting paid more at my new job

23. im meeting with the head chef on saturday to go over the new menu and do paperwork

24. its cool outside and it rained

25. im going to hopefully start a new diet, liquid, a family friend did something similar and lost TONS of weight

26. my favorite show was on last night and tonight :)

27. i found some books that i thought i had lost

28. my tattoo isnt red or itchy this time

29. i didnt burn myself at work today!

30. the burn i did get on tuesday didnt blister and feels fine now

packing!

i brought home some boxes today from work.. about 5, and packed them up. one with movies.. one with books.. one with misc. bathroom and jewelery stuff, a box of candles and one of clothes so far.. and some hang up stuff too. i talked to the chef at my new job and im comming in on saturday to do some paper work and go over the new menu, im excited. my first day will be wednesday the 11th. and my last day at my current job will be the 6th, im going to miss the girls i work with tons! im going to be working with coffee girls at the new place, i hope they arent snobs lol. when i got home from week, a family friend was here with her kids swimming.. they know how to get in and its cool with the family.. i told her about my new job and moving, shes really excited for me. she said her and her husband would come for dinner one night. that will be cool :) she's really cool, really easy to talk to. while i was packing i found some clothes that i havent seen in a while.. so that was cool, mostly summer stuff.. which is nice since it is.. summer. lol tomorrow ill bring home a couple more boxes.. i dont think there's much left to pack except clothes, not untill we move into a bigger place.

the news

so, now for the big news.. Miss Fran is now owned.. crazy huh? i was completely stunned, and shocked when They came out and told me. there had been some issues with Mr Hubby feeling like he never got any time with me.. that all my time was with Miss Fran and he got the left overs. he wanted to be able to have the power to veto. i have no idea whatsoever how they come up with this solution, but lordy it will be fun.. Mr Hubby says that i will get the chance to spank Miss Fran.. hehe. im excited and terrified at the same time! sunday night we were laying in bed and Miss Fran started pinching my nipples really hard and i was trying to get away and being kind of loud.. and Mr Hubby said if we didnt tone it down we would be sleeping out in the living room. i asked him what he wanted me to do.. he said fight back..lol. i think not! so i finally got my tits protected and She went for my ass and i shrieked a little and he told us to get our asses into the living room.. Miss Fran got the floor.. and i got the couch lol. i got my tattoo touched up on sunday.. and Miss Fran got a tattoo also, a L on the back of Her neck. its really pretty

what a weekend

so much has happened this weekend. today ill start with the great news (not that the other isnt good news.. its not good or bad.. its news tho!) I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am so happy! i called the head chef on saturday and thanked him for the interview and asked if they had made a descision yet.. he said that they hadnt and that they were going to have a meeting on monday to make one.. he called about 3 hours later and left a message(i missed the call) saying that they didnt need to wait because they wanted me for the job! i was so happy i gave Miss Fran and Mr Hubby big hugs and kisses. im moving in! big changes in store (more about that tomorrow) i gave my 2 weeks notice today at my current job.. and that went really well. everyone is very happy for me.. my boss and asstant manager were almost stunned.. they know about Miss Fran, Mr Hubby and i's situation.. they get all the steamy details and such hehe.. but i dont think they took me seriously before.. the asstant manager got big eyes and said.. wow, your really doing it arent you? your moving in with them.. and i laughed and said ya! i wasnt joking! lol im so excited. im going to be moving some things in the next two weeks.. i already left some clothes there before i came back home.. im a little sad that i wont have anything thats mine there.. other than clothes.. i hope that changes when we move into a bigger place.. i just want to feel like its my home too.. might be kinda hard if i dont have anything there lol. its not a huge deal.. just not what i expected when i moved out for the first time.. but things are better than what i expected too.. when i used to think about moving out.. i thought it would be with my sister.. or my best friend.. i never thought i would get to move in with two people that i love and care so much about. the journey is taking another turn, there's a long road ahead of us, its gonna be bumpy and smooth, twisty and turny.. but a great ride none the less :D

pain and punnishment

*covers my face* yep, more and more blonde moments lately.. oy.


as a masochist how do i feel about pain as punishment. for me its all about the state of mind, if Miss Fran were to spank me, or use the crop, or anything, the implement doesnt matter, if Shes doing it to punish me how can i find any enjoyment in it.. like the last time i screwed up and didnt do my blog.. what She said afterwards was more punishment than any kind of physical pain She could have inflicted... i dont find all pain pleasureable.. for me its all about headspace.. when we scene for pleasure of course i get pleasure from it.. but as punishment.. i would take it as it is.. even if it is something that i enjoy, like spanking.. if She's doing it as punishment, and is disapointed in me, talking about what i did wrong.. i wouldnt get any sort of pleasure from that.

How does the blond cunt open a window?

That's My girl : )

thursday i had my interview. i came home, and Mr Hubby and i watched a movie while waiting for Miss Fran to get home. She called and said that She wanted to go to the gym as soon as She got home and for us to be ready when She did. so we all went to the gym, it was fun belive it or not. so we came home and Miss Fran cooked really yummy dinner and She let me watch my favoritest show. :D Mr Hubby said he wanted a massage, and then a blow job hehe. so when it was over we went into his bedroom and he layed down and i used some massage oil and did his back and legs. he got his blow job and came in my mouth *yum* ^.^ after Miss Fran said She had something planned for me, i had no idea. so Mr Hubby went to bed and Miss Fran told me to get in the shower.. and not to turn any of the lights on, She lit candles in the bathroom and in the Bedroom.. i got in the shower and soon i heard the door open and Miss Fran got in with me. yay! *claps* ive never taken a shower with anyone other than my sister when we were little lol. She washed my hair and washed me from head to toe. it was so nice.. and She looked so pretty with all the steam in the bathroom and Her wet hair :) i was nervous at first because i felt nurtured, indulged, and those are new to me in this relationship. i was looking foward to washing Her as well, but when She was done with me i was instructed to dry off, brush my teeth and get in bed on top of the covers face down. butt plug time!! *clapps* ive never used one before but i really enjoy anal sex.. so She got out of the shower and got on the bed and massaged me for a little bit, then She got out the butt plug and told me i better lick it good because it was the only lube i was going to get. but then She was nice and ended up spitting (which was way hott) on my ass for a little more slipperyness hehe. so She got it in, without even a whimper (i think She was disapointed) but She got a moan when it went all the way in. She got up and opened the closet door. yay! good sound. She asked me what i thought She was going to use, and i said the crop.. i think it just might be both of our favorite. so She stuck to just my left ass cheek.. owie, no rubbing between smacks, i never realised how much rubbing them out inbetween sets or whatever helps.. still tryin to get some lasting marks on me other than hickeys, no such luck. when She was done She asked how it felt.. and i asked how what felt.. my ass cheek or the plug.. She laughed and said both, my ass cheek felt stingy, but the plug felt good hehe :) then we went to bed.. and ended up waking up in the middle of the night pulling on each other because we thought the other was falling off the bed.. which neither of us were.. lol it was really funny, and a really great night

movin on up (or in)

had the job interview today.. i think it went really well. the guy *josh* was really nice, and so was the owner, she was really cute.. red head, really skinny, big boobs, freckles. i think i have a really good shot at getting this job, the working space itself is pretty small, but the menu is simple. it looks like its something i would do really well at. in culinary school my chef always said that i made really good soups. i went and bought my butt plug today.. i got a red one. they didnt have the right size of purple ones at the lovers package i went to. it should be interesting, ive never used one before. i cant wait to get out of my job and moved in with Miss Fran and Mr. Hubby. wish me good luck!

color of my soul

What color is your soul painted? Brown Your soul is painted the color brown, which embodies the characteristics of calmness, depth, nature, stability, tradition, poverty, roughness, down-to-earth, uncertainty, and neutrality. Brown is the color of the element Earth, and represents soil and, to a lesser degree, fertility of the Earth. Click Here to Take This Quiz

Quizzes and Personality Tests

job interview wOoT!

tomorrow i have a job interview at a cafe that is a lot closer to Miss Fran and Mr Hubby. i am excited. i hope it goes well, i think it will, i am certinly qualified for it! im excited to see Miss Fran and Mr. Hubby tomorrow, and all weekend hopefully. i miss them so much during the week. everyday i come home and spend at least 45 minutes looking for jobs, usually its an hour or more. keep sending my resume out. ive always hated looking for jobs, but it wont find itself! Miss Fran wants me to buy a butt plug *blush* hehe. i went to lovers package today and checked them out. some are really weird looking, but they come in a lot of cool colors! hot pink, and purple, thats what color im sure Miss Fran will want me to get. everyone wish me luck on my interview tomorrow! i have all my fingers and toes crossed!

service's sake

Do you ever find you enjoy the service just for the service’s sake?

im one of those girls who's always wanted to be married.. to be the traditional house wife. i go on these domestic stints.. where i actually clean my room, and tell my mom that ill cook dinner tonight. i may not ever get to marry Miss Fran and Mr Hubby, but i am slowly and surely wiggling my ass into the 2nd wife spot. lol. at least im sure as hell trying to! i love making the bed, doing the laundry, cooking dinner. makes me feel more and more like im a part of things, like im making my place. Miss Fran wants me to learn how to do pedicures. i hate feet. i really do. dont even like talking about them. but when She told me She wanted me to learn, i didnt freak out.. not entirely sure why, but im *mostly* looking foward to learning, and doing that for Her. i know it will make Her happy.

stress relief

Think of a time when your owner provided some stress relief for you. What was it that relaxed you or helped your calm your nerves?

the first time that comes to mind is the night we all first met in person. and its funny because im sitting here thinking about it, and i think She actually overwhelmed me to try and get me to relax. lol. i was sitting there with HUGE butterflys in my stomach, She called and said ok, we are here.. i was sitting at a table and there were a lot of people at surrounding tables.. my hair was covering the side of my face and i was tearing up a napkin and a straw paper. They come up to the table and She said "aww, shes hiding". and then She told me to move over. lol.
She put her arm around me and was playing with the top of my breasts and kissing my cheek and neck. She KNEW i was nervous.. i had been telling Her the week prior to meeting how nervous i knew i would be. so She played up on it. and Her overwhelming me helped a lot. but another thing is when i get home from work, and ive had a horrible day, which is most days.. getting home and sitting down to do my tasts help de- stress and de-agitate me, it helps me concentrate on the things that matter. my job doesnt matter, because hopefullyi wont be there much longer :)

grow

How has your owner encouraged you to grow as a person? As a submissive?

the other night Miss Fran and i were talking, about how i can come to have such a hard time at communication. it sort of stems from something that happened, and how my parents handled that something. i love my parents very much, i know now that they are better parents than what i used to give them credit for. anyways, i was telling Miss Fran about it and She helped me see that it wouldnt have mattered if the out come of the "something" had been any different. She told me that the next day i was to pul my parents aside and tell them that i love them, and that i havent been giving them enough credit, and that i was to start telling them that i love them every day. which before then isnt something i did. maybe every couple of weeks would those words be spoken. Miss Fran wants me to grow as a person, grow as a daughter, and of course as a sub. My tasks are to write in a blog daily and read a D/s yahoo group, and to read and comment on 2 other submissive blogs. all those things help me as a sub. i cant thank Miss Fran enough for making me pull my parents aside and talking to them, im sure they were afraid at first that i was going to tell them that i was pregnant or something.. lol. i think that as the communication with my parents gets better then it will also help in my relationship with Miss Fran and Mr Hubby as well

performance test V

"i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately."

im a selfish person. im young.. 22, only have had one "real" relationship before this one. so im a little behind i think. i get so worried about how i *think* people are going to react, i let my imiganition run away from me, and i end up freaking out, and thinking the worst is going to happen. i get myself in SO much trouble doing it, and im trying so hard to just aim for a middle of the road reaction. i cant assume what people are going to say or think unless i say something about it in the first place. i get so freaked and make a big deal, and then get in trouble for not talking, and they are more mad about that then what i was freaking out about in the first place! oy vey!! *smacks forhead* think ill get it right anytime soon?

i almost lost them last night. i said something before i thought it all the way through. Mr Hubby has a daughter, and i know that he loves her very much. i know how sad it makes him that she doesnt want to be a part of his life. one of the things i was worried about when i moved in is if she decided to come back, she has done it before and i thought that if she came back then i would have to leave. she's his daughter.. i thought i was right in assuming that. i didnt realise that he was giving that up for me. i felt so horrible, he got so upset and had every right after what i had said. i was thinking about myself, what i was giving up, and not seeing the other point of view. he loves me enough to maybe have to tell his daughter that she cant live with them, if she ever comes around(which is a slim to none chance). he said he didnt want to see me anymore. i thought i was losing everything. losing Miss Fran, losing Mr. Hubby, and everything we had at that point.

Miss Fran and i talked, i made a list of things that i felt i needed to work on, and She asked me to make a list of what i thought that She needed to work on, i made a copy for each of us. one of the things i had put on Her list was that i thought She needed to show more emotion.. we both realised that we are completely opposite. i show my emotion, but cant communicate, and She can communicate but cant show emotion. i got real tears out of Her last night and i didnt realise how much that would mean to me. we got up and Miss Fran had told me that Mr Hubby had calmed down and was willing to talk to me. i was scared, and ashamed of how i had acted with both of them. and i cant begin to say how thankful i am that they love me enough to keep giving me second chances.

performance test IV

"i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately."
last night Miss Fran said She had come up with a solution to the sleeping arrangements. it has given us some trouble. Miss Fran and Mr. Hubby sleep seperately. Mr Hubby doesnt like sleeping with anyone. Miss Fran doesnt think i should get to sleep with Him if She doesnt get to. so Her solution was for me to sleep with Her if i was a good slut, and if i was bad i could sleep on the floor at the end of Her bed. i had never slept with anyone. Mr Hubby is the first person ive ever spent the night with. i knew he didnt like sleeping with anyone.. but i thought he wanted to sleep with me.. so he was "dealing with it" not that he doesnt.. he just doesnt get any sleep. ive made it a huge issue.. i want to sleep with both of them. i didnt mean to sound ungrateful. i like sleeping with Her too. when She told me last night i *thought* that that would mean i wouldnt get to sleep with Mr. Hubby ever. and if he doesnt ever want to sleep with me then its his right, he should tell me so. i dont want him to sleep with me to make me happy. if it doesnt make him happy i dont want it.

this was me, jumping to conclusions. i got a little upset and i sounded like a petulant child a bit im guessing. crying the whole bit, making Miss Fran think that i didnt want to sleep with Her, that She wasnt good enough. that was the last thing i wanted to do. i love Her, i love Him. who doesnt want to sleep with the person(s) they love? its just a lot of adjustments to make with 3 people. its hard enough in a relationship with 2 people to keep everyone happy. i hate the feeling that i am making everyone unhappy. that they are unhappy with me.

today is the worst day ive ever had since beggning this relationship. on the verge of a panic attack all day, upset stomach, horrible mood swings, exactly like back when i was manic depressive. on the verge of tears all day, because of the feeling that i am making worse, that i am making them unhappy. why cant i just do what im told without questioning it? i was in a relationship for 3 years where i did nothing but make the other person happy. was i happy? no. i want to make them happy, i want everyone to be happy. i was so afraid that i would have to walk away from them. that we couldnt be happy. that is what put me in my panic mode. ive found the the that feels right for me.. i told Mr. Hubby last week that this is the first relationship that i have ever been in where it is completely 100% me. ive not changed myself to make them happy, but maybe thats what i need to do..

Performance test III

"i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately."

sunday afternoon we went out looking for an aprin, and some books. Miss Fran informed me that i would be wearing an aprin, and only an aprin to cook dinner that night. we went to barnes and noble first, She was looking for a couple of books. Screw the roses and give me the throns, and SM 101. we couldnt find them on the shelves so She made me go to the information desk. She thought i would get embarassed. hehe. i did it with no hesitation and no embarassment. which i think was a tad dissapointing for Her lol. needless to say they didnt have the books. the girl said they might be a little too extreem for Barnes and Noble. bah. ive seen them at borders before.

next we went to Ross to see if they had an aprin for me. Miss Fran wanted a cute white frilly one. but Ross doesnt have frilly ones. so She settled for one that She liked well enough. She told me She wanted me to go try it on.. WHAT DO YOU MEAN TRY IT ON?! lol. we were on our way to the dressing room when She asked me what i was going to tell the dressing room attendant when she asked why i wanted to try on an aprin.. i hadnt even thought about that!! i pleaded with Miss Fran to let me take another article of clothing in with me. and thank goodness She let me. She came in with me and made me take off my top and bra and put the aprin on. i was giggling and She kept having to put Her hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. She turned me around and we were kissing and She was playing with my breasts and i was REALLY turned on. i wasnt so giggly after that. hehe. then i asked Her how we were gonna get out?? lol. She reminded me that it wasnt uncommon for 2 girls to go into a dressing room togeather. so we left and went to pay for the aprin. im sure my face was bright red.

i love doing things for Her. i thought my blog was mine.. it is but its Miss Frans too. i do it because She asks me to. everything i do should come with the thought "is this something that would please Miss Fran, or is this something She wants me to do, or did i do it to the best of my ability." i guess the day i forgot to do my blog before entertainment i wasnt doing that. when i am with Her i feel like i do a good job, better than a good job, but when im not able to be with Her, i definately fall behind on that. i dont do it on purpose, because i think ill get away with it, because obviously i cant! lol i think its just because i am in a different space after ive been at work all day, and then come home to my family. i would never do anything to displease Her on purpose

performance test II

"i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately."

people submit differently. submit means to give over or yield to the power or authority of another. if submission is something that can only be given freely, why would someone not do what their told? i have no excuese. even if i did, nothing would be valid. when Miss Frans asks me to do something, i am to do it. i submit because its a part of me. i started learning about BDSM when i was about 16. i dont think i could be happy in a relationship without it. thats why my situation with Miss Fran and Mr. Hubby. i get the submissive part of me fulfilled, but i get the "normal" part fulfilled too.

Miss Fran and i belong to a yahoo group that is for BDSM newcommers. i have learned a lot from the group. yestesterday a question was posted to the group. sub/slaves/pets.. what is your favorite form of service? i have two. we dont get a lot of chances to scene. now that i think about this, it may not be considered a service. we might scene once a week. i know She loves getting into our formal roles. and i do too. my other favorite form of service is house chores. i love doing things like doing Her laundry, cooking Her dinner, making Her bed, taking the dogs out for Her. it makes Her life easier, especially after the things i put Her through. its the least i can do.

we talked last night about solutions to the current situation. and we agreed that She needs to be more assertive. things are changing. and im going to do my best to do everything She asks of me. in a quick and efficent manner, to the best of my ability, and the way She wants it done. i am on a shorter leash now, so to say. hehe. i have to report and ask permission for just about everything i do. i think it will help me stay it a submissive space. i have two job interviews set up for the next week. as soon as i move in i know that will also help things a lot.

performance test I

"i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately."



i dont live with Miss Fran and Mr Hubby, not yet. right now my only daily tasks are down to just my blog, and job hunting for at least 45 minutes. She wants to make sure i find a job soon. Yesterday i had done my job search, but before i had done my blog, i had gotten on WoW to see if Mr. Hubby was on. i didnt get on to play, but thats not the point. i screwed up again, Miss Fran pointed out that it was almost exactly a month since the last time i had done the same thing. so Miss Fran asked me to blog on "i will perform all duties and services without question. Instructions will be carried out immediately" from our contract all week.

i am trying very hard so find a new job so i am able to move in with Them. i think that once that happens things will get a lot better. right now i live at home with my family, and i go to work. i dont have any physical interaction with Miss Fran at all during the week. at work i am pretty much my own boss, i have a boss but its more of a title. i come home and i live with my family, both parents and 2 siblings. i certinly am not submissive at work, and dont show it at all at home, unless my mom asks me to do something... but thats because shes mom =) my feeling is that when i move in with Them that things all around, in all area's will change, hopefully for the good. i know that being there will change my submissiveness. because right now i only really have to be "in role" 2 maybe 3 days on the weekends.

my tasks, and my submissiveness needs to be my priority. its harder now because my interaction is mainly with people at work, and with my family. i talk to Miss Fran on and off during the day, but its not the same as being in Her presence. i talked to Her about this earlier and She agreed that i do a good job when i am there, i am glad and relieved that She thinks so. i have to prove to Her that my submission is important to me. and doing what She asks is a good way to do that. i berate and punish myself more than She ever could. i didnt sleep very well last night, and i was on the verge of tears all day at work. i dont want Her to give up on me. i need to get my head in the right space, and keep it there. and i know that it will be so much easier when i move in.

got them all cut

i got my hair cut today.. i didnt have him style it because it costs more.. so i came home and eventually got to drying it and styling it. started to cry. i dont like it. i usually go to a more expensive salon.. but i cant really afford it so i went to a cheaper one, and i know now why you pay more at expensive salons. i cryed for like a half hour trying to do something with my hair. i know its not really that bad.. but its the things that i notice that i dont like, anyone else probablly wouldnt. this weekend was good. Miss Fran bought me a new outfit :) lol an aprin. its what i got to wear while making dinner sunday night. i was freaked out.. being mostly naked, cooking dinner.. with Her snapping pictures of course.. i got more comfortable eventually and She got some AMAZING pictures. i see myself different in Her pictures.. i never want to look, cuz i never like pictures of myself.. but i was so amazed at how She captured me. i want to print it and post it everywhere. Mr. Hubby went to bed early cuz he was really tired, so Miss Fran and i stayed up to finish watching the movie, and then i made dinner for Her.. i have been feeling really domestic lately.. its funny how something like doing the laundry and making the bed and fixing dinner can bring so much satisfaction. we also resigned our contracts.. for another 3 months. i added something, and She added something. and we signed. :) are you supposed to sign a contract forever? or are you supposed to do a short term thing? either way, in three months we will re evaluate.

renewal

monday is the 11th. a month after we signed our contracts. its been a month full of ups and downs. my tattoo is healed, but will need a touch up. i wear my everyday collar now when i sleep.. i only take it off when i shower.. or if i remember to at work (im not supposed to wear it at work, work rules, not mine) my tattoo is my permanent collar. i am looking for a new job so i can move in.. im so excited about this step. so excited. it will be another first with them. i hope i find a job soon, a good job. so i can start saving more. so we can move into a bigger place. i want to renew the contract. even though we have had bumps i still feel like we are moving in the right direction.

thankful thursdays

im thankful that:

1. Miss Fran and Mr. Hubby want me to move in

2. i had a really good time in levenworth this past weekend with my friend and her mom

3. tomorrow is friday

4. its not so hot out!

5. i got to work with my friend brenda today

6. Miss Fran got me the wow expansion :D

7. everybody is feeling better

8. my favotite show is on tonight

9. i got a adorable new purse :D

10. that Miss Fran and Mr Hubby love me

honey im home!

lately Miss Fran, Mr Hubby and i have talked about me moving in. this is something that i really want to do.. i get off of work and all i want to do is drive there. right now it is an hour commute each wayif traffic is good. the longest its taken is 4 hours. and 100 miles round trip. its a long way. im afraid that if i move in, that things wont get better, that they might get worse. thats why i want to hold off a while on getting a job by their house.. i want to see how things go. they made it work is Mr. Hubbys daughter, so it could most likely work for the 3 of us. its just a big step, one that i really want to take. but we cant move into a bigger place untill i can help pay all the fee's and stuff, rent.. and i am so broke its not even funny. i cant get a head for the life of me. my dad wants me to apply at his work.. its a little closer to them, not much tho. maybe about 45 minutes instead of an hour. if traffic is good. but i know the insurance is good, the pay is a LOT better than what i make now, i know a lot of the people and am friends with a lot of people who work there. it would be weird working with my dad though.. lol

ive had the best day of my life

Write about lastnight's scene .At the end of your post I want you to rank each of the following:
(1 being least favorite and so on)
Crop
Black Slapper
Hot Wax
Flogger
Breath Control
and locations
Tits
Pussy
Back
Legs
Ass
Feet
Miss Fran convinced me to call in sick to work yesterday :D i dont know why, but yesterday, i would have to say was probablly one of the best days of my life. and i cant put my finger on the reason why, it was just an awesome day. we went shopping at walmart and costco, came home and played WoW for a while, i made dinner for them.. and then Miss Fran told me to go put on my collar and cuffs, hands and ankles. i went into the bedroom and got nekkid and put my cuffs and stood quietly. She knew when to come in because i wasnt jingling anymore hehe. She brought in the straps to secure me to the bed and i attatched myself as much as i could and She got the rest, and put a blindfold on me. She brought in the ipod and we listened to Korn. i liked the music, i thought it would be distracting but i liked it a lot. i always have a hard time of putting a scene in order after the fact. i believe She used the crop on me first, i like the crop, but it felt like the cane to me, i was suprised after wards to find out She didnt use the cane at all. She used it on my back, sides, back of legs, feet, ass. and She brought out Her new black slapper, which is really stingy, and She used the purple nylon flogger between some of the hits and i found out that i LOVE that. the different sensations feel amazing. i think She had me hold the crop between my teeth while She used the slapper. THEN She totally suprised me by pouring hot wax down the middle of my back.. woah. it made me cry out but i love hot wax, just have never been suprised with it before. She cleaned up the wax and had me roll over and reattach myself so i was on my back. for some reason i feel so much more vunerable on my back, i jump a lot more when i am, i feel so open and unprotected. She used the crop and slapper more, i cant remember if She used the flogger on my front side or not. i remember that She didnt use the wax on my front either. She spanked my pussy with the slapper.. i love having my pussy spanked when i am on my hands and knees or on my tummy, but when im on my back i hate it. weird, i know. She made me hold the crop in my teeth again. She took it out, and started kissing me hard, i love to kiss. making out is probablly one of my all time favorite past times. but since i had been crying, and my blindfold was down over my nose i couldnt breathe. it was really intense, i was running out, trying not to breathe through my nose and get snot everywhere, so i inhaled and stole Her breath. it was a really interesting experiance.. She did it again soon after the first time. She put clamps on my nipples and i had to beg to get them to come off, they came off and She licked them nicely, which i am very thankful for. but She found my hair clips and put those on instead, but they wernt nearly as bad. after that was cuddling and petting time. i love that part . i loved all of it. it was just a really good scene for me. for Her too i hope. it was really balanced, not too much or too little of anything.

Crop 2
Black Slapper 1
Hot Wax 5
Flogger 3
Breath Control 4

and locations

Tits 2
Pussy 1
Back 5
Legs 3
Ass 6
Feet 4

but my day doesnt end there. i think i got up a little after midnight to put everything away, i have to get up at 4:20 am mind you, for work. so Mr. Hubby suggests that we pull an all nighter, cuz he got up really late and wasnt sleepy either. and after a scene i always get an adrenalin rush and get really hungry. so we watched a movie and then we laid down and talked for a long time, played some, he bit my ass and i gave him head for a long time.. He eventually turned on one of the lamps above the bed and watched me give him head, that was different because we usually do everything in the dark lol. so that was nice. he came 5 minutes before my alarm went off lol. we got up and he made me a drink and i went in to say good bye to Miss Fran, i always get so sad when i have to leave. but the whole day was perfect. everything felt in place and right. except the leaving part. that never feels right. so here i am going on my 29th hour of no sleep, and im am a glad panda. im so happy.

nothing but the same

To maintain honest and open communication and be treated with nothing but the same"

that is a quote from O/our contract. to me it means that on that one thing that W/we are on the same level. that i can expect the same amount of communication, that She requires from me. communication is so important in keeping everything balanced. if you keep things to yourself, or if She were to keep things to Herself.. and theres a problem, how am i supposed to fix it, if She doesnt communicate to me what im doing wrong? and vise versa, if i have an issue, then She cant understand or even come up with a solution if She doesnt know about it.